Friday, November 14, 2008

That'll Be $60 Please

Why is it that preparing to go to the gynecologist, takes almost more effort than preparing for your wedding night? Seriously, there's a lot of prep work to look good for the doctor. (Don't worry, she's a lady. Well, maybe that should make us all worry more.)

After spending the necessary amount of time getting myself presentable, I showed up at the doctors office yesterday, right at my appointed time. You see, it was time for my "yearly". Yes, the appointment that I've put off for nearly 2 years because I love going oh-so-much.

As I glanced around the waiting room I counted 8 other ladies waiting. "Oh dear, this can't be good." Jarom was home watching the kiddos and had a meeting scheduled an hour later that he HAD to attend. (Honestly an hour should be plenty of time to get in and out of the doctor's office. Don't ya think?) But the nurse called my name and took me back almost immediately, so I figured all would be fine.

So back to the room I went, leaving my magazine on the waiting room table. The nurse handed me the robe and sheet, told me to undress, ("The robe opens in back, and the sheet goes on your lap.") and said the dr. would be right in. Let me tell you, I've been walked in on before while undressing and that isn't pleasant, so I undressed with the speed of lightening and hopped onto the table, covered myself with the sheet and proceeded to wait. And wait, and wait....and wait, and wait some more. I was kicking myself for setting the magazine down. Why don't they have things to read in the actual exam rooms anyway? Well, there was the breast feeding chart, complete with pictures, on the wall.

I started sweating knowing that Jarom needed me to get home and also I was getting nervous about the oh-so-pleasant procedure that would be taking place (hopefully) shortly. Then I started sticking to that stupid tissue paper on the table. Move, "riiiiippp", shift, "crackle crackle". I felt like the whole world could hear every move I made. Not to mention my back was killing me from sitting like that. "Should I lay down on the pillow? Maybe pretend that I'm at the spa?"

My purse with my phone (and clock) was sitting just out of reach for me to grab so that I could check the time. I contemplated whether or not I'd have enough time to jump off the table, grab my phone, and get back on the table before the door to the room flew open and the entire hallway saw my exposed back side.

Wait, wait, wait...tick, tick, tick...crackle, rip, creek, crackle. "Okay, DASH!!!" The time? 10:48. Ten forty eight people!!! I had been waiting, naked, on the table, just shy of 50 minutes. "What to do now? Even if she does come in here within the next 5 minutes it will still take at least 10 minutes for the procedure plus discussion time." There was nothing to do but get dressed and leave.

So I redressed with that lightening bolt speed, shoved my under garments in my purse (Oh yes I did!) for fear of someone walking in on me while I took time to put them on, and then I left. I told the receptionist that I had to get home and couldn't wait any longer. To which she replied, "Oh, well did you just want to reschedule then? The next appointment we have available is a month away." No "sorry you had to wait for an hour," ...or "we know your time is valuable" ...or "we understand the prep work it took to get here." Nope, just "we can't see you again until next month." Arggghhhh....

Days like this are when I wish I was brave enough to send them a bill for my time.

23 comments:

The CEO said...

Sorry, that sucks. You should have been vocal about the wait...I would have. The other thing that's frustrating is OB/GYN's are always off schedule because they have to deliver babies, and fit those in with their appointments. So, think of it this way...your doctor was late because a new little one was entering the world. Feel better? :)

Elena said...

Oh if only Shanna. However, I could hear her the entire time making the rounds to the others. And if she had delivered a baby earlier that morning and was behind, they should have told me straight up when I got there. I've had time to stew over this, and am even more annoyed now.

"The Queen in Residence" said...

That is why I do not go. The whole thing is just so humiliating!!!

One time I went, when I was young and . Anyway, I went in and they had a big screen tv in the waiting area and they were just starting a movie that I had never seen and wanted to. So I sign in, get a seat and start watching the movie. When the movie ended I began to wonder what had happened. It was all a big mix up but one that I was not real mad about. I got 3 hours off work and watched a movie that I did not have to pay for and all in all it was a good time at the OB/GYN.
I loved the telling of your tale, the crinkle of the paper was priceless!!! Thanks for making all of us women go, oh yeah I have done that too. I still think you ought to send them a bill, that is just plain rude.

stevie kay said...

Unless you absolutely LOVE your doctor . . . time for a new one! Or, if you can see a PA or nurse practitioner that cuts the wait time a ton.

I've also noticed (especially since I've been into the OB every other week lately) that if you schedule your apt to be the first one in the morning or first after lunch, there's not nearly the wait because they haven't had time to get behind yet.

And I'll share a quick story that may make you smile. When I went to see my dr two weeks ago, I had to take Landon with me, and wouldn't you know it, but we ended up being there over two hours! So this week I came prepared! Landon went to preschool, I snagged a magazine from the waiting room, AND I brought a craft with me that needed some hand stitching. Once in the room, I usually wait a long time. A minute after the nurse walked out, I pulled out all my sewing and got everything set up for the long haul and not 30 seconds later, the dr walks in. So much for being prepared!

Natalie♥ said...

O my gosh Elena I know exactly how you feel. That is not cool. I always plan on at least 2 hours when I go in for my checkup. It shouldn't have to be that way especially sitting in the room on the table for 50 minutes, O O O I would be mad!!

Emily said...

laughing, laughing, laughing! I go to the gyno on monday and am very scared about it. It's always so not fun.

Wendy said...

Such a great post. We have *all* been there! Write up the bill. It will make you feel better!

:-)

Anonymous said...

I hear you. It makes me so mad. I have been actually been forgotten and my chart lost. So whenever I am in there longer than 20 min I always peek my head out the door, and ask how much longer. Cause you never know. I bet an angry phone call would get you an appointment within the next week. They always have spots open they don't tell you about.

Anonymous said...

I hear you. It makes me so mad. I have been actually been forgotten and my chart lost. So whenever I am in there longer than 20 min I always peek my head out the door, and ask how much longer. Cause you never know. I bet an angry phone call would get you an appointment within the next week. They always have spots open they don't tell you about.

Jennifer Jamison said...

Good grief! It's so frustrating when they don't tell you up front what is going on...

Keys to the Magic Travel said...

I despise going. I need to find a new doctor. The place I went used ot have midwives - and they were wonderful. But now they are all gone and it's just doctors. Who I swear lose the ability to relate to real people during those long hours of med school and internships.

And the waiting? It's just wrong. Katie has to go to the orthodpedist 4 times a year. Our wait has ALWAYS been an hour or longer.

And waiting at the ob/gyn does not make sense. Because it's most likely that there is a doctor specifically for the hospital that day - and not the one you have an appointment with.

Lee Ann said...

Love the sound of you sticking to the paper. I had to leave once too. Why shouldn't they be able to see you in an hour when they're with you less than 15 minutes?

My OB just called to reschedule my Dec. apt. The first opening they had with my dr was APRIL!!!! They called me! I did't change my plans! Seriously!

Oh ya, and sitting straight up on that table. I usually just lay down. It's way uncomfortable!

Anonymous said...

So there it is...I learned more about you in 90 seconds of reading than I had in the previous 17 years. I'm not sure if I should laugh or cry.

And why do I suddenly feel the urge to throw rocks, change the oil in something or lift something heavy?

But seriously, it's time to search for a different doctor's office.

Unknown said...

I am still laughing about your descriptive story! Sorry about all the waiting, and waiting, and waiting...is it not soooo annoying? And it only happens when you absolutely HAVE to be somewhere! UGH!!

Elise said...

$60.00 is cheap for what you went through!! I say bill them $200-- and maybe a little extra for psychological damages and backside chill. At least your writing is hilarious-- you should submit this somewhere!

Jennifer Jamison said...

Hey --- I have an idea! Maybe you should tell the office to start a program wherein if the patient has to wait more than 30 mins for the doctor, then her next Pap is free! :)

Tamie said...

you know it is a conspiracy, right? there are NEVER any clocks in any of the exam room sin ANY dr. office! it is a CONSIPRACY!!!
very humorous elena!

Unknown said...

k- nobody reads your blog. Do they? Ha...I love your story lady. You need to Jet on over to DR LEAVITT...He is up on the latest and greatest and TOTALLY did a great job on my last c-section.....LOVE HIM! Em

The Shep's Herd said...

Elena you are so funny. I almost laughed my head off. Your description was pricless. I havent been for 2 or maybe its 3 years for the exact same reasons.

Miki said...

lol.....satisfactory phone karma is at work....you know what I mean.

;)

Unknown said...

I realize this is an old post but I had to comment - because - how is it that we can put a man on the moon, cure horrific diseases, and reduce a computer that was once the size of a small house into someting the size of a new-born-pinky, but we CAN'T make a material for dr's tables that DON'T STICK TO YOUR NAKED BUTT?????

You wanna spend some of my tax money? Research THAT!!!!

I think I found you from Kat... but I'm not sure... but I'm glad I wandered over.

Camille said...

Hee hee. You inspired me. I guess I really should blog about my trip to the doctor. Hmm. Am I really that brave? Ask Katie, it was pretty funny.

LouandAngela said...

Oh Elena! Tears are running down my cheeks! You have such a way of expressing EXACTLY how it works! I can almost FEEL the paper crackling and sticking! You're hilarious! How frustrating! Shame on them. They need to be more customer friendly!