Thursday, May 20, 2010

Letting Go

Have you seen Hoarders on A&E? I am completely fascinated by this show. Fascinated because I really can empathize with these people to some degree. No....my house does not have 1 foot pathways to walk through garbage, or mountains upon mountains of stuff, nor do I have 45 animals, and yes, I can throw away garbage. But....I am VERY sentimental and have major guilt when I get rid of things. For some reason, I feel like I am doing something bad, not being grateful, wasteful even.

Oh, I know all the lingo...."Someone else could use it now, when you're not." "If you haven't used it in the last year, you most likely won't ever again." "If it doesn't give you pleasure, get rid of it." "It's not the item you're remembering; it's the memory." Yes, I do know these thoughts, and force them into my mind. But it still doesn't make getting rid of things any easier for me. Especially when there is any type of memory attached to the item.

My kids have been begging me for the last few years to participate in the neighborhood garage sale. A) I don't garage sale...rather, I donate my things, and B) we've always been out of town the weekend this thing has hit the neighborhood. But this year, we'll be here and if my kids want to participate, I'm going to let them. If they are okay with getting rid of their things, then I want to encourage that behaviour. (I don't necessarily want to encourage them to think that selling is better than donating, but I think once in a while it's an okay thing.) I certainly don't want to them inherit my curse of needing to keep things.

It's no secret that I have wanted another baby ever since Kate was born. It's also no secret that Jarom has NOT wanted another baby. It's been a process for me, but I've finally come to terms that 4 children is enough (really more than enough) and what I was wanting was really just a baby. Not another child. Does that make sense?

Anywho....in an effort to get ready for the garage sale, I've been going through the baby clothes and things. Ughhhh.....it has been ripping my heart out. And there are some items I just can not part with. I feel like I'd be selling the child if I sold certain articles of clothing. But I am limiting myself to what I can keep. I think this a HUGE step for me!

So far so good. I have a big pile of things in the garage that I'm letting go. Now.....give me strength to REALLY let it go come Saturday when I have to watch MY baby's things walk out the door with someone else.

Please......love me regardless of my craziness.

And nope....these little darlings won't be going anywhere. These are the sweet little outfits I brought each baby home in. Were they all really so tiny once??

15 comments:

Brandon and Emily said...

Elena, I am proud of you! Good work! I am completely opposite of you, I love to get rid of things. I think it is because I grew up with a mother who kept everything! LOL. I love you mom!

betty said...

OH YES, HOW I CAN RELATE! AND YES, I HAVE WATCHED SEVERAL EPISODES OF HOARDERS. WHAT IS REALLY FASCINATING TO ME IS THAT I HAVE SOME OF THOSE BEHAVIORS. SO, INSTEAD OF HAVING TO DEAL W/ SOMEONE HAGGLING OVER MY PRECIOUS,"GOOD STUFF", I'D RATHER GIVE IT AWAY! AND THEN EVEN THAT BOTHERS ME! THIS IS GOOD STUFF MIND YOU!! WOW, THANK YOU ELENA FOR BEING SO CANDID. NOW, I MUST GET BACK TO WEEDING THROUGH MY "GOOD STUFF" LOL! SPRING CLEANING......

Deanna said...

I hear ya...Those outfits are adorable. :) Your girls (and Carter's wife) will be glad you kept just one item, and it will be a keepsake. :)

You're inspiring...yet I feel just like you...I have a hard time letting go of those sentimental "THINGS"...it's too hard sometimes!

Gregg said...

EMILY! i HAVE GOTTEN RID OF A LOT OF THINGS IN MY LIFE! And I might even put the pink stove in Elena's garage sale! PS Betty let me know your were talking about me. Mom

Tim and Stacey Cardon said...

I just want you to know that you are not alone. I worked at Once Upon A Child for a while and saw people cry over things they brought in. It is hard! Tell you what, I'll let you hold Isla and pretend that she's yours for a bit if you want!

Cherie said...

It is definately hard to clean things out and let go. I have been known to cry as I have packed up rooms and packed away baby clothes, etc...Oh it is hard.

You will be so glad you did it though. I always am after the fact because you really do need to room and not the clutter.
Good for you Elena!!

Also I have seen that show Hoarders and it totally grosses me out but I cannot stop watching - ha ha.

Sherrie said...

It's a lot like losing weight, it feels so good once it's gone.

I'd keep those outfits too :)

Kari Lynn said...

I totally see where you are coming from! It's difficult to decide to thow things away, I always seem to throw stuff I need later out, and keep the things I don't need. Your bab outfits are cute though.

Willy Happy Mama said...

No one talks about how emotionally difficult it is to "be done having babies". There is certainly a grieving period. I found joy after the pain of parting with my darling clothes by giving them to other babies I loved. I most certainly kept favorite outfits! Like the ones I got their professiional photos taken in. Good luck with the garage sale. You'll be glad in the end...$$$ got get something for yourself. ;)

Benjamin, Kaylin & Eli said...

Reading these comments made my day! So funny! I can't wait to see if the "Pink stove" makes it into the garage sale! :) I agree with keeping favorite outfits for your kids! They are fun to keep and remember just how small they really were!

Elena's Mom said...

Stop.......you're killing me. (Ha)

Crystal Escobar said...

I know how you feel. I have a hard time getting rid of stuff, but I also HATE clutter. So it's a tough one :) I've just recently started taking pictures of sentimental things, and that way I won't feel as bad getting rid of it :)

Tonya said...

HAHA... I loved your post. I too love to watch that show.

Hang in there my dear be strong. I will allow you to kept the pictured items....good choice.
Love ya

Jennifer P. said...

I don't have cable so I only get to watch this show on occassion--but I can sooo relate too. When I hear the people talk about the fact that they can't clean because they're actually perfectionists and if they can't find the time to "do it right"--then it just doesn't get done. THAT I can relate too! So many times I think I have to wait for a weekend my kids aren't here or I'll never get the house cleaned in the way I want it to be, or that it won't stay clean for more than a half hour. When I come to that point, I have to make myself accept "good enough". And no way should you throw away baby outfits! :)

Allisyn said...

I had a hard time letting go of my son's little outfits .. so I made them into a quilt. I have also had the need to get rid of things.