Friday, August 29, 2008

Time to laugh at myself.

Jarom tells me that there is "just enough goofiness" to love about me. Sometimes I feel like I am ALL goof, but maybe that just makes me more loveable?? My motto in life is "You better be able to laugh at yourself, because everyone else WILL laugh at you." So without further ado, here's a story that we can all laugh at about little ol' moi.

I got invited to join a book club in my neighborhood. I was SO excited about it. I've had a bit of a hard time adjusting to this move (I know, it's been THREE years.). I REALLY miss my Boise/Nampa friends a lot and haven't found anyone to really bond with here. Now I KNOW I am judging here (so slap my hand), but sometimes I feel like I live in a neighborhood filled with hopelessly perfect women. They are beautiful, have meticulously kept homes, children dressed to the nines and NEVER dirty, are eloquently spoken, and the list goes on. They have talent and poise oozing out their noses. And then there is me, 100% goofball, dirty house, weeds in my flower beds, and kids who wear their clothes 2 days in a row. I've been a bit intimidated (okay, a lot) and haven't allowed myself to make many friends.

Anyway, I was really excited to go to the book club hoping to finally get to know some more people. I wanted to wear just the right thing of course, so I decided on a black shirt. I didn't have any black shoes so I bought a new pair specifically for the evening. (Emily, I got the black mocassins at Target, so cute!)

When I arrived at the house, wouldn't you know it, it was a no shoes house. So I took my brand new shoes off at the door. (Bummer.) Then I remembered my toenails weren't painted and in fact my big toes had chips of paint on them. (Oh that's just great.) But THEN I remembered my velvety soft heels due to the PedEgg (At least my feet won't sound like velcro as I walk across the carpet.) and I was okay with myself. I glanced down at my feet, and horror of horrors, my lovely new shoes had DYED my feet BLACK!!!! I started sweating and tried to pull my pant legs a little lower to hide the fact that I looked like I had just run barefoot down the road.

I finally gave up and just admitted my hideous flaw. And you know what? Everyone just smiled and laughed and it was okay. They were very friendly and I think just maybe I'll be able to make some friends. I don't know why I put the pressure on myself to try to be perfect. I honestly do know that no one else is. We all have our hidden black feet somewhere.

So, I've made up my mind to just be myself, goofiness and all, and I'm going to try a little harder to make some more friends. And I'll remember that it's okay if everyone is laughing at me, because I am laughing at myself too.

19 comments:

Camille said...

Great Story! Don't worry, I'm laughing WITH you! It's a shame for you to be shy about making new friends. It's obvious that you are a great friend to those who are lucky enough to call you that, and you wouldn't want to be stingy with your ability to make people feel important, as you have a talent to do. Good luck with your new resolve to be more outgoing! It does sound like an intimidating neighborhood!

Nichole Jolene said...

remember not to compare your insides, with other people outsides. i know SO many perfect looking women, who have WAY more insecurities than me which makes it easier to get out of my cocoon (where I'd really like to stay). be brave! have fun~

Jennifer P. said...

Hmmmm.....maybe you should move to Blackfoot?! :)

I don't care if you have weeds in your flowerbeds or kids in 2-day old clothes or black feet--you have SO much to offer as a friend. Never forget that! And I hope you DO find some kindred spirits there. Just don't forget about us :)!

What book are your reading by the way?

Willy Happy Mama said...

You let them know the real you! Black feet and all. You're terrific! I love you just the way you are! The best friends are those that want to visit YOU- not your clean OR messy house. You have so much to offer and share, I hope you'll keep getting involved. :) Way to go!

elena said...

Thank you everyone for lifting my spirits. You're all so kind. I do really know I have things to offer too, but it can be difficult to jump in sometime. Ya know?

Jennifer- We read Anne of Green Gables last month and this month we are reading "A Girl Named Zippy."

J&K Manwaring Family said...

Do you live in my neighborhood? :)
That sounds exactly what I've gone through here (I didn't even switch cities) and I have come to the same conclusion. I'm glad you had a great time at the book club. You are such a fun person it's surprising you'd be intimidated at all!! And hey, now you've got new friends AND new shoes. What a deal!:)

becky ward said...

those black mocassins sound adorable! and i am so glad that you had a good time (despite all the horror)! you really do have SO MUCH to offer as a friend. i almost hate for you to make more friends which would mean less time for me !): but, i will try not to be so selfish. this story had inspired me to start a book club with some neighbor girls and try to make some friends too. look at us hermits shedding our shells! (:

Miki said...

I had a good laugh over the phone with you....thanks Elena, and have fun over your weekend.

Lee Ann said...

I think everyone of us could learn from this.

So glad you jumped in. I don't know if I could have done it. I tend to stay way too much to myself and then complain that I don't have friends. Go figure.

Emily said...

WHAT? Those blasted moccasins. Oh! The horror! I would have died. That reminds me of the FRASIER episode where Frasiers dad Martin dyes his hair dark brown (he's grey) and it rubs off onto the chair he is sitting at durring some fancy-schmancy party. Hilarious! Your poor thing.

I have gone in circles with this issue lately. I had a close friend dumped by another friend just because she moved into a bigger house--- and I think she feels she does not need her old "smaller house" friends anymore... which is a shame. We are trying to rally around our friend right now. It's such a shame because she is so nice and I just think that it is terrible that ol "big house" would say something such as "I just don't think we have anything in common anymore." What is that?

Anyway-- it's made me so mad, and I am just angry at people who put on heirs. I'm not perfect, and I let everyone know that up front!

I love this story Elena, and I love you--- and your black feet too--- but not in a lesbo sort of way.

And if that last sentence offends in any way, just erase it from your mind.

Deanna said...

You are more than welcome to come and hang out with Stevie and Me. Our kids are usually dirty, though we sometimes try - sometimes don't care, and you definately won't have to be intimidated by our 'house' - this four plex is rockin with toys and screeching parents and messy hair, and three-day-old outfits! So please - next time you want to hang out with people that don't care if your toe-nails are chipped with last months color, come hang out with us - who let our two-year-old boys paint our toenails...and feet, and their legs. :) I SOOOO look up to you, so please stay!

The Shep's Herd said...

Oh Elena, How I have felt just the same way. I just have to share with you a small story. I was teaching a lesson in RS. It was about Joy. I shared with the sisters that I look at them sometimes and think I will never measure up. I told them sometimes I feel if I had their lives I would have it made. I continued to talk aout joy and how I learned I can't compare myself to anyone. God made me who I am for a reason, flaws and all.Thats what make me special. Well after the lesson the sister who I have allways admired and to be honest was the one who I always looked at and thought "If I could have her life I would have it made." came up to me thanked me for my lesson and told me that I was the person she looked at and thought "if I had her life I would have it made." I learned a big lesson that we are all the same in one way, we struggle with our own insecurites. We all want to fit in. Elena just relax and enjoy your life, people are drawn to you for who you are not who you think people want you to be. We love Elena---don't change a bit !!!

Kat said...

I really liked "A girl named Zippy." Sometimes I feel very much like her mother - I just want to lie on the couch, read, and ignore my children :-)

I am glad you went to the book club and I am sure that you will find yourself a kindred spirit...

Lou & Angela Harris Family said...

I love your goofiness too!! You're so REAL!! Thanks for sharing that great story! I laughed out loud! I hope that you love this book club and feel more a part of your neighborhood. My book club saved me!

Debbie said...

And this post is why I love you so very much. You are so honest and real. I love it and I wish you lived on my street!

Jeni said...

Hey, you are always welcome to hang out with your old "high school" nobodies anytime! Right Brenda? I really know how you feel, but just be yourself and people will be drawn to YOU and not an image! Like I tell my daughter ALL the time Don't worry what other people think, be a friend to all and you will be the most popular one in the end! It is true, just wish I would've followed my own advice long ago! Keep hanging in there...

Jonathan & Rachel said...

Elena-who couldn't love you! You are a crack-up-I always tell Jonathan how much I would love to hang out with you-The story about your dyed feet is hilarious and I'm not sure who wouldn't want to hang out with someone as fun as you!

Jonathan & Rachel said...

OH yeah...I wanted to mention that at least your feet didn't stink-I can assure you that mine would have :)

Manwaring Family said...

Thanks for sharing such a sweet story - I know we all feel that way - it's nice when someone talks about it! If you need a reality check in the neighborhood ... come to my house :) P.S. Just so you know - I'm trying to keep up with you :)